Without Judgement.


[ original photo by @xisarahix on instagram ]

Realising this morning that I’ve been sitting in fear these past weeks. 

I’ve been fighting it, resisting it, trying so hard to be right. 

Worrying about long-term relationships; about the new and subtly about the past. 

Through all the “what ifs” “shoulds” and “was I right?” I found a place this morning. A little bit of comfort, perhaps some resolution, and definitely a way forward from here. 

From 13th Century philosopher Rumi:
“Out beyond the ideas of right-doing and wrong-doing there is a field – I’ll meet you there.”

This is the place where I will sit down, to spend some time, to talk through my life with other humans. 

Because the biggest gift I can grant myself, and the biggest gift anyone else can give me right now, is to sit (with me) and consider my life so far – without judgement.

Revealing Feelings.

20150527-230927.jpg

[ poetry inspired by this photo from Kylie Parks ]

.

Be sad
Be happy
Be however you feel
Forget the masks that you are compelled to wear
Be who you are at the moment
Honest and open
Let others ask
Let them know and really respond
Let us all be a little more honest
With ourselves
and each other

A Snapshot Of Truth.

Am I trying to be someone that I’m not?

Expectations of how to be
a husband, a lover, a companion
None seem to fit the person I am now

Expectations on myself
about showing love, about feeling
None seem to fit the person I am now

Who I am is the person I am right now
When all my thoughts, desires, goals
seem at odds with a big part of my life

Am I lying to myself?

Where do I go from here?
Keep up a relationship pretence
Or honour my current confusion and direction?

As I attempt to find myself amongst the confusion
Finding myself fully
Would be the healthiest outcome possible

Leaving behind all expectations on myself
About relationships, about existing
Finding my truth is the goal

Everything is leading to this

Finding my truth is the only real way forward.

Flowing Duo.

brave writing
emotional writing
honest writing
courageous writing
necessary writing
necessary words
true words
strong words
difficult words
challenging words
challenging self
expressing self
honouring self
revealing self
freeing self
inside self
inside out
screaming out
pushing out
letting out
outing fear
facing fear
and eventually
overcoming fear

.

[thanks to http://summerstommy.wordpress.com/ for the spark of inspiration]