Battle Cry.

I would cry out for help
If I thought I was heard
If I thought I mattered enough
For anyone to care.

For I don’t understand any of this
How could another possibly comprehend
the torment, confusion,
the nothingness
And the all pervasive incompleteness
of my existence.

The words in my head are that no-one listens
No-one even reads what I write
So none of it matters.

Except the battle
Stop fighting and I will truly crumble
into nothingness
So the war itself has meaning
A purpose I don’t understand
like any soldier.
I am the conflict
Both sides of the fray
I am winner and loser
I am casualties and victories
When I win, will I lose too?
If I lose, will I celebrate victory?
Or like all wars
will there be no real victor
just widespread collateral damage?

Time to take the moral high ground
Conscientious objector
to all this destruction
Make peace
Be the change you want to see
Find who I truly am
Quietly and determinedly
Make love not war.

20140327-181756.jpg
[Artwork by David Rosen]

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10 thoughts on “Battle Cry.

    • I’m glad you identify with this as it lessens the loneliness I feel sometimes. I’m sorry that you feel like this and suffer in a way most people don’t understand. I’m glad you think this is beautiful, as it is a catch of my inspiration (something I often fail to achieve as successfully as I would like) and I feel proud of it’s beauty too!

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  1. This is amazing. I really applaud you. Not just for your ability with words, but also with your willingness and skill with sharing your feelings. Once again, I feel like these could be my words, aside from the fact that you write so beautifully! Well done.

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    • Such a wonderful comment, thankyou! Word-ability comes with time and practice. I’ve been pressing regularly (more or less) for just over a year but writing for untold years before that, see https://avulnerablespace.wordpress.com/2013/11/29/how-i-started-writing/. The willingness is easy and essential. The skill is difficult, but well practised.

      If these could be your words too, then take them, they ARE yours. Let them BE yours. Do something with them yourself – rewrite them, or just let them inspire you to something else, something new, or something old. Don’t be afraid of what you write, it will be so different to most other people, because it is you. You already write amazingly – Keep at it and let yourself realise that its always worth it.

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    • Thankyou Abbie. Still struggling – currently frustrated with little progress over the past year or more. Although I know that is untrue. There have been some big positive changes, just as much as some issues are still there.

      Liked by 1 person

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