I Feel.

I feel grief and sorrow
Over my loss
Loss of feelings
Loss of love
Loss of connection
This hurts so
Missing these feelings
Missing these emotional connections
that are the only way
I feel real
and alive.

Perhaps they’ve been
pushed out
by the anger
and resentment
of relationship failings
over recent years
So much hurt
so much pain
Filling the heart with grief
until it can hold no more
no more love (for her).

Still caring
but unable to love
Unable to connect
Unable to share feeling
without the barriers coming up
So I feel more alone
(with her)
than I’ve ever felt with anyone.

Together and alone.
My heart cries
My heart breaks
All that I felt for her
has drained away
Leaving behind
flesh and bone
dry and brittle.


7 thoughts on “I Feel.

    • You have certainly picked up the feelings that went into this. I have decided that the loneliness comes from a lack of connection, someone “just being there” is not enough. And with connection, the feelings may return. I have felt some small recovery since.

      Writing helps me to connect with myself, with my feelings, because I am just learning how to deal with it all.

      This piece was a day my feelings shifted to relationship grief from the recently predominant death grief.


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